Phylly’s Law.

I’m back with the laws to make your jaws hit the floor…s,

LAW 6. 

Lion Crossing. No cars are allowed on roads. Instead, the roads are replaced with sleeping lions. At a former Zebra crossing, now renamed a Lion Crossing, pedestrians have to cross a road while attempting NOT to wake sleeping lions. The lions are mildly sedated, so could come to life at any time, resulting in carnage. 

LAW 7. 

The thought Law. All thoughts are now played out loud as soon as they appear in your head. You are talking to someone and instead of your speech, they will hear your thoughts. Many, many people will be beaten as a result, or completely ostracised. Say you’re seeing someone’s new baby for the first time. You would want to say “How cute.” Your mind might instead say this:

“Jesus, another bald pink shitter in a pram. Just what the world needs.”

Or in my case, seeing someone I find attractive. I might be thinking this:

“I’m imagining you naked with crisps covering your genitalia.”

ALL thoughts are playable. I can never go to a pub again. 


About neilstilwell

Abseiling into trouble, a sewer rat staring at the stars. Disgusting. You can assist my search for the one ring by buying a Kindle version of this diary from here. It has some other stuff in it, and a dreadful cover.
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