Monthly Archives: October 2013

BABY BABY BABY

I never know how to cope with babies. More specifically, the showing of them to me, by friends. You know the thing… “Oh! Look at my baby pictures!” they coo, shoving a phone under my face, depicting a pink ball … Continue reading

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Got some kind of FUCKING PROBLEM with the new Kindle?

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Old Gary Barlos.

Good old Gary Barlos. In some ways my life truly ended with the release of Take That’s cover of Could it be Magic in 1993. One thing is true, it’s not written by old Gary Barlos, the John Lennons of … Continue reading

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Crushing Dreams.

I’ve always known that my first born would be called Amelie, if it’s a girl. In any case, gonna have fun with my kids when they’re born and old enough. “Listen. As you’re now four, It’s time I was honest. … Continue reading

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Due to extended traffic, there are more of you reading than ever before, largely thanks to the lovely Jim Sterling posting a tweet of one of them. Hello. I had a dream last night that I nearly married a cat. … Continue reading

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MY LAW: VOLUME 2.

Some more laws for your eyes. Ones that I will introduce when I dump the coalition out of the arse-hole. 3. All sandwiches are just bread. In fact, just bread sandwiches. No butter. Three slices of bread is a sandwich. … Continue reading

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Non-Existent Girlfriend.

“Neil?” “Yes, my sculpture of feminine brilliance? My Aphrodite from the concrete jungle? My flowing, graceful one?”   “Er…yeah..fine. Whatever. You know I love you and everything? Despite the oddness of your character turning now from a sort of endearing … Continue reading

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