CRANE

INT: Studio.

Frasier: God I’m bored. Might have to shit through a pipe into Roz’s handbag again…EH?

Roz: You won’t be. Don’t get any ideas.

Frasier: Where the FUCKING HELL did you come from, titshit?

Roz: Stop calling me names.

Frasier: Allright, Ballholes. What do you fucking want?

Roz: What happened to you? You used to be a loveable dickhead, getting into farcical situations but generally coming out as the good guy.

Frasier: I don’t fucking know. Why do cats fuck in skips? Is that all? I want to get back to microwaving this mouse kidney for my fuckin’ dinner, broad.

Roz: Manager wants to see you about your little dog mask incident yesterday.

Frasier: FUCK.

Later:

INT: Office.

Frasier: Alright boss? Wanted to see me?

Manager. Yes..er..Crane. Sit down.

Frasier: Cheers. What’s this about?

Manager: You wanking with a dog’s face on your face. Do you even need to ask?

Frasier: I did not. Roz is titting well making it up the cunt…

Manager: Well, look at this.

(Shows CCTV footage, showing Frasier’s sick masturbation show.

(“URGH! UUUUUUUUURGH! Oh, yes, I am the DOGFATHER! JESUS! AHHHHHH)

Frasier: Fuckin’ modern technology.

Manager: What the HELL were you doing? Wanking with a picture of a goddamned Doberman on your face?

Frasier: It was a German Sheperd.

Manager: I DON’T FUCKING CARE!

Frasier: Blimey, you don’t want to see what I did with the cat picture in the toilets then.

Manager: GET OUT. You are warned. Any more of this and you’re out, Crane.

Frasier: Cheers, Hammercock. Smell you later.

Advertisements

About neilstilwell

Abseiling into trouble, a sewer rat staring at the stars. Disgusting. You can assist my search for the one ring by buying a Kindle version of this diary from here. http://www.amazon.co.uk/frozen-fridge-Zoomeister-Diaries-ebook/dp/B00C426DD0/ref=sr_1_sc_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1366481719&sr=8-1-spell&keywords=a+frozen+turd+in+a+hot+frudge It has some other stuff in it, and a dreadful cover.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s